Divorce doesn’t just affect the parents.

According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, divorce is the ending of a marriage by a legal process. This can be difficult for a lot of people, including children. It is commonly stated that a divorce hits kids the hardest. Negative effects occur in children, but they are not as extreme as they have been described in the past, according to Kathleen O’Connell Corcoran, Ph.D. and Practitioner Member of the Academy of Family Mediators.

Corcoran stated that the common misconception that these children have a drop in grades, get in trouble with the law, and suffer from depression are a bit extreme. She believes that negative effects still occur, just not to the extent that has been described in the past.

A 2002 study at the University of Virginia showed that divorce has negative short time effects on children, such as anger, anxiety, or shock. When children with divorced parents were compared to children whose parents were still together, only small differences were found in regards to school and behavior.  

The factors that determine how a child would deal with divorce used to be the actual divorce itself or the difficult transition between homes, but now the factor is considered to be conflict. Many arguments can arise from conflict which may lead to the parents not wanting to talk to each other. If the parents cannot work together and be civil, it is more challenging for the child.

An anonymous HHS sophomore girl felt the effects of having divorced parents because she has been dealing with it for two years. She agrees that is it important for the parents to be able to communicate. When her parents cannot talk about something as simple as who will take her little brother to soccer practice, it makes everything more difficult.

“We’re the ones being penalized,” said the anonymous HHS sophomore girl.

An anonymous HHS sophomore girl believes that a child should not suffer because parents cannot communicate. It is not fair to the children.

An anonymous HHS sophomore girl does not have a set schedule for switching houses or for where she and her brother will spend holidays. An anonymous HHS sophomore girl also described the days leading up to holidays as being filled with a lot of arguing between her parents to see who will get to be with the kids. She shared that usually the day will get split in half: half with her mom and half with her dad. All of the arguing and conflict can be a lot to handle for her.

For those kids whose parents can communicate when necessary, the child’s life is made a lot easier.

Kaylee Thomas, HHS sophomore, has been a child with divorced parents for seven years. Although the divorce was a little difficult at first, her parents’ ability to communicate has made it easier. Thomas’ parents only talk through emails, only when necessary, but that is much better than nothing at all, according to Thomas.

Thomas’s parents have worked together to make a schedule for switching houses, so both parents have an equal opportunity to see their children. Every Wednesday she switches houses after school. Thomas likes having a set schedule because she knows when she will be switching houses and can plan accordingly.

Despite most children succeeding after a divorce because of good communication between parents, divorce is still thought of as a challenging transition to have to go through that can hurt a child forever. Both an anonymous HHS sophomore girl and Thomas have found that the previous popular thought is untrue. Thomas claimed that divorce isn’t as bad of a thing as it can be portrayed.

“It’s just my new normal,” said Thomas.

Advisors note: This article was edited from the original at the behest of one of the students interviewed several months after publication.  She has been replaced with “an anonymous HHS sophomore girl.”  Publications normally do not edit articles after they have been published except to update them or correct a factual error.  Neither was the case here.

Any time you speak with a reporter, from The Broadcaster or any publication, your words will live on beyond that moment.  Think, then speak with wisdom and care.